The Wedding Mother And Her Role In Some Countries

In some countries, such as Spain, for example, there is a time-honored tradition during the wedding whereby the wedding mother has additional responsibilities during the event. However, this custom is not in line with the canon law of the Church.

Therefore, it is usually just an additional form of honoring allowing the mother of the groom to feel special on this important day.

In such a tradition, the concept of wedding mother can refer to both the groom’s mother and his godmother. Such a person helps with certain aspects of the wedding ceremony. In general, the duties and responsibilities of the wedding mother depend on the type of wedding.

Do you know what they are all about? And do you know why this role is so important? We guess not, as we will not be mistaken in saying that in Poland this custom is completely unknown. So, in this article, we will discuss the four responsibilities of a wedding mother.

Wedding mother, godparents and the Catholic Church

Traditionally, the parents of the bride and groom also act as wedding parents at Spanish weddings. When it comes to traditional weddings, we can all imagine a woman, usually the groom’s mother, walking with her son down the church aisle.

She then remains by his side throughout the ceremony, welcoming guests, helping the groom to function efficiently on this important day, taking over some of the conversations, and so on. This is the role that is referred to as the “wedding mother”.

While their role may seem very important from a functional point of view, it is much more important from a purely religious point of view. In fact, the wedding mother also appears in other sacraments, such as baptism and confirmation (in Poland, this role is called “godmother”).

These functions appear in canon law and serve to “assist” and generally understood help.

However, godfathers do not have a special role at the wedding. So there is no special function known as “wedding father”. Instead, the godfather simply spiritually “helps” with faith initiation as a mandatory form during baptism and holy communion.

Nevertheless, canon law does not consider wedding fathers necessary for the celebration of marriage. Therefore, their role is more symbolic, in line with the accepted tradition, and is not necessary for the ceremony.

In any event, the requirements to be wedded parents, according to canon law, are as follows:

• Must be at least 16 years old.
• You absolutely must be Catholic. You should also go to confession and receive Holy Communion.
• You cannot be subjected to any kind of canonical penalty (neither in the past nor now).

Since a wedding father is not technically required, but rather is merely a wedding tradition, this means that wedding fathers do not apply these requirements.

Is the witness the same as the wedding mother?

Godparents and weddings are religious figures, and witnesses are secular figures required by current legislation. And that means no, they are not the same. The witness is not a religious figure, but a person who has to legally validate the marriage.

Therefore, it is normal that, in most cases, wedding parents are also witnesses at weddings if they so choose. However, there is no reason why anyone else should be the witness.

The witnesses do not have to be religious as they are only serving there for legal purposes. Therefore, the Catholic Church does not expect them to be Christians or even baptized persons.

By law, they must have sufficient legal capacity (that is, be of legal age) to witness the marriage and sign the relevant certificate.

The wedding mother and her tasks and duties during the wedding

As we have seen, it is a tradition for wedding parents to be present at many Catholic weddings. In this sense, the wedding mother has some important duties, even though they are not official.
So let’s take a look at them.

The wedding mother should help the groom choose a suit

The godmother accompanies the groom in choosing a wedding suit. Helping the groom to choose a suit for the wedding day is one of the most important responsibilities. In most cases, she will pay for it too. In any case, he must help the groom to make the right decision.

But it is not everything. The wedding mother herself plays a key role at the wedding. Therefore, her outfit must also meet certain standards. She must look elegant and well dressed… and never wear full black or white.

The wedding mother should accompany the groom to the altar

Obviously, this is the most emotional moment of the event. The wedding mother must lead the groom down the aisle, take his arm, calm him down and let him get excited about the new life that will soon begin with his new wife.

The wedding mother always joins the wedding father when they leave the church

The groom arrives with the wedding mother and the bride arrives with the wedding father (or just her own) before the couple is officially declared husband and wife. Then, after the ceremony, the newlyweds leave the church together.

For this reason, a new tradition has begun in which the wedding father and the wedding mother leave the church together, right behind the bride. The wedding father is usually met on the right side of the wedding mother and they both congratulate the guests as they leave.

Wedding mother’s duties: organization of the wedding

The wedding mother is considered to be one of the main hosts and organizers of the wedding.

Traditionally, the wedding mother is a key figure at the wedding – though, of course, not as important as the bride and groom! Therefore, she usually sits next to the bride and groom at the table to make sure all the guests are having a good time and having a great time.

Another tradition is that the wedding mother should also assist in the selection and preparation of all the wedding details (from the floral decoration to the party itself).
Do you want to get married in a church? Or maybe you want to take advantage of the charms of this long-standing Spanish tradition? So do you know who your wedding mother will be?